In the first reading for Sunday’s Mass, the Lord God told Elijah to “Go outside [the cave] and stand on the mountain before the Lord; the Lord will be passing by.” But the passage notes that God was not in the wind, or the earthquake, or the fire. After the fire there was a tiny whispering sound. Then it says, “When he heard this, Elijah hid his face in his cloak…” Elijah assumed God would reveal himself in some bold and demonstrative way. But Elijah discovered that God was revealing himself in a very subtle way. God often makes himself known to us in very gentle ways.
Listening carefully for the movements of the Holy Spirit helps us to “hear” God speak to us in the depths of our heart, not simply with words but with subtle patterns that need to be discerned. As did Elijah, so we too might have preconceived notions about how God leads and guides us while missing the ‘tiny whispering sound’ by which we discern the voice of God speaking to us. Just as we have patterns of communication with each other so we must learn to recognize the voice of the Lord and the patterns of communication that are typical of his presence in our lives.
Recently, I was invited to speak at the “Pint Night” gathering for young adult Catholics here in Grand Island. I presented on the topic of discernment and how to hear the voice of God among the other competing voices that surround us. Most of us would like God to be “loud and clear” in how he communicates with us. Yet, God is often more subtle, and it was that subtle voice that he was training Elijah to hear in yesterday’s first reading. To the contrary, the evil spirit is often loud, forceful and demonstrative, at times even jarring, abrasive or accusatory. The Holy Spirit doesn’t disturb us. He inspires us. He warms our hearts, but he does not blast us!
Discernment is a matter of patiently asking the Lord to show us what is best for us and paying attention to how he answers us, often in tiny whispering thoughts, feelings and desires. When it comes to discerning something, typically, we begin by making a list of pros and cons about a choice to be made or a direction to be chosen. Good discernment is not a matter of choosing whichever list is longer….8 pros and 4 cons. Nor is good discernment realized by asking God for a sign – like saying, “Lord, if I should take this new job offer, let there be a red car broken down on the side of the road along my route to work today.” Sometimes discernment comes through a conversation with others, especially people who know us well and who listen carefully to what we tell them about the options. Their reaction, either way, may help us understand more clearly what God is asking of us.
So, if God is more subtle in the way he reveals himself to us, then we need to become more tuned in to how he operates in our lives. This begins by asking God during our times of prayer to show us his love and give us what we truly need to live accordingly. Then in the quiet of our hearts, we should pay attention to what we hear inside, what stirs in us and what seems to have God’s love and care written all over it. In time, we soon discover that interior voice that is more like a tiny, whispering sound, but that brings with it a clear sense of what we need to know and understand.
Sometimes the issue that we are discerning brings with it what I call a “false urgency.” We feel pressured to decide and afraid we will miss out on some opportunity if we don’t “jump at the chance.” Doing so, however, may often lead to disappointment or regret. It is always better to err on the side of caution rather than impulse. Again, what’s in the ‘tiny whispering sound’ versus the clamor, stress and anxiety of having to make a quick decision that leaves us feeling uneasy. There is a lot of false urgency in our world today. If it is something the Lord desires for us, it will still be there when the urgency passes, and we can more calmly make a decision.
In the Rules for the Discernment of Spirits given to us by St. Ignatius of Loyola, there is an important rule that I think bears consideration. Rule #5 says this: “In time of desolation, we should never make any change but remain firm and constant in the resolution and decision which guided us the day before the desolation, or in the decision to which we adhered in the preceding consolation. For just as in consolation the good spirit guides and counsels us, so in desolation the evil spirit guides and counsels. Following his counsels we can never find the way to a right decision.”
In so many situations in life, when things become difficult and painful, we seek the fastest way we can find to relieve the pain. While this is true for physical pain, it is especially true for emotional pain. When “the honeymoon is over,” people might easily conclude that they made a mistake and, for example, want to leave the marriage. St. Ignatius counsels us to never make a change in desolation but only after the desolation lifts when we are in a better disposition to make a decision.
There is much more to say about discernment, but listening carefully to what we are thinking, feeling and desiring and understanding where those thoughts, feelings and desires are coming from, enables us to hear the tiny, whispering sound of God’s voice. The mature Christian seeks the guidance of the Holy Spirit in everything and allows the Lord to lead them in what is the greater good. Trust that as you learn the art of discernment, you will make good decisions and avoid false conclusions about the important matters in life.
